Resident Reflection: Captured

Tainted. Bruised. Scarred…I’m captured. I’m not really sure what they are meaning when they talk about living. I try to live, the only way I know how…grabbing hold of my desires. First it’s comfort, and then beauty and last…being invisible-what I’m best at. Holding on tight, not to drown. Knowing my life will find meaning if
I can just…be Perfect.
The fight goes on, I know I can never be perfect yet I keep struggling…just one hand after the other, the next step into my darkness. No longer do I see light, I gasp for my next breath… one answer comes to mind, the ONLY answer…giving up-
Letting go
Yes! That’s it…that’s my answer I’ve been searching for all this time. So I slowly loosen my grip and let my hands fall. But NO they can’t fall, something is around my wrists…”What the heck” I scream into the darkness. “What is this?! Chains!! I didn’t ask for chains.” And suddenly I hear a laughing horrible voice scream… “you thought you were alone. You thought you had control. But…NO…you serve ME as your master! You are captured. Anyone who commits sin is a slave to sin. I’m the father of evil. Your body and soul belong to me!
Come, my slave…Come!
“NO! NO! I scream. I’m NOT yours! I’m not yours!” I turn to run…but the darkness is everywhere. I’m scared and fall to the ground in fear and my chains.
“Oh what have I done…look at what you’ve become.”
Suddenly, I see a glimmer, a sparkle. It’s a light! Coming towards me…I cover my eyes in fear, cowering, my body shakes. This light encovers all around. It’s like nothing I’ve ever known or seen before. And I hear a gentle voice calling out my name… “I’ve chosen you. You were mine before creation. Come my beloved and
Choose me”
Still scared to death but my soul shouting inside me… “That’s what you were created for…HIM you belong.” With my weak and exhausted body I reach forward to the light, and then something happens…quickly my chains are gone…fallen to
the ground and smashed into pieces.
Kneeling there amazed at what’s before my eyes. “Who are you?” I cry. “And why do you care about me?” once again I hear that gentle voice that speaks straight to my soul. He says “I am your TRUE MASTER…and you’re the one I’ve called from the beginning of time… YOU were MINE. I’ve loved you even when you walked in darkness,
I was there all along”
Now holding on tight to my new Master…I am captured but this time, captured by
My Prince.

VOH Residents and Grads